Summertime

Hi, everyone. A few of you have contacted me, wondering why you haven't seen any blog updates since March. Despite rumors to the contrary, I'm still around and doing relatively well, though I had a pretty rough patch from March thru June. When I last wrote, we'd just returned from our fabulous cruise with my family. On March 16, Dad and I flew to CTCA in Zion, IL in hopes of resuming the brachy therapy that had been so successful in reducing the size of my esophageal tumor. Once they scoped me, though, they determined that there was too much dead tissue from the previous treatments to proceed at that time. They went ahead with a CT scan, which showed no signs of spread, and sent me home to recover for another 3 months. It sounded like fairly promising news.

Unfortunately, I continued to have difficulty swallowing and lost even more weight. This went on for a couple of months as I became increasingly fatigued and malnourished. Julie and I finally returned to Zion on June 2nd for a checkup and testing. The news was a mixed bag. Once again, the CT and PET scans showed no evidence of cancer outside the original tumor, which was very encouraging. However, the bad news was that the tumor had expanded to its original size, effectively closing off my esophagus and preventing me from swallowing. The radiologist told us the risk of death from resuming the radiation was much greater than the possibility of shrinking the tumor again, so that option was eliminated. A medical oncologist reviewed my case and said he didn't have any chemo options beyond what I'd already done. Finally, the gastroenterologist implanted a large stent in the middle of the tumor that keeps my esophagus open and allows me to eat. It's not a cure, but he feels that the tumor is growing fairly slowly, and this should enable me to function normally for some time. As a backup, he also surgically inserted a feeding tube in my stomach, but he doesn't think I'll need it in the forseeable future.

Now that I'm home again and able to swallow, I've gained back a bit of the weight I'd lost. My biggest frustration now is the constant exhaustion, which is normal for someone in my situation but certainly limits my activities. I'm also still plagued occasionally with a rapid heartrate and the low blood pressure that results from the meds for the tachycardia. Sometimes I think the meds are worse that the conditions they're meant to cure.

Our days are fairly quiet in this period they refer to as "living with cancer". We've missed out on a couple of key events like watching my nephew, Ethan, play in a lacrosse tournament in Baltimore and attending a reunion of Julie's family at the Jersey shore. With my diminished level of energy, it's exhausting to travel. Fortunately, my sister, Suzy, her husband (David) and the kids (Rachel and Ethan) carved out a couple of days for a great visit here before they headed home to Colorado. My sister Beth and husband Joe will come down next weekend for some R and R. We are looking forward to a visit from Elizabeth, Jayson and little Ian on August 11. We'll all drive up to Stone Harbor, NJ, for our annual week at the shore, where we'll be joined by Ashley and Dan. Our friends from Holland, Micky and Jeroen, will also be there for part of the time, and we hope to see Beef and Joan Meader, Julie's uncle and aunt, there too. We also hope to have my Mom and Dad here while Elizabeth and family visit, so we have a very full remainder of the summer.

Thank you so much for all your expressions of concern and support. Even if I haven't responded personally to you please know that it's from a lack of energy, not a shortage of gratitude. I remain awed and humbled by the love and goodwill that you have expressed.