Julie and me having fun with our friends, Jan and Mike KesslerLast January I visited my oncologist. Things weren’t going very well at the time, and I asked him about how long I could be expected to live.
Now, I resent doctors who play God and pronounce death sentences as if they were law, but I asked him and he answered. He said that Christmas 2007 was very likely my last and that I couldn't expect to see the holidays in 2008.
Well, the holidays are here, and so am I. In fact, I feel much better than I have in months and have been getting stronger every week for the past six weeks or so.
All this and the arrival of Thanksgiving has made me think about what I am thankful for. Here is a partial list.
I am thankful for you. For all the friends and family who have been interested and kind enough to read this blog.
I am thankful for all the cards, letters, emails and phone calls I have received.
I am thankful to be able to drive the car.
I am thankful for the changing of the seasons.
I am thankful for the special kindness of people I hardly know.
I am thankful for my parents, who are alive, young and healthy at 88 years old.
Last night I looked out the window over our bed and saw thousands of stars. I am thankful for this beautiful universe and our place in it.
I am thankful to have some fantastic friends.
I am thankful to wake up each morning.
I am thankful for the love and support of my family.
I am even thankful to mow the lawn (at least most of the time).
I am thankful for Julie, who has has sacrificed much for me without complaint.
I am thankful that I have lived to know my grandson and expect to see my second grandchild in March.
I am thankful to still be alive and relatively healthy.
Strange as it may seem, I am even thankful for having cancer. Of course, I would rather have spent the nearly last two years in some other way, but cancer has taught me a great deal. I am now forced to live in the present moment. I have discovered how compassionate people can be. Cancer has taught me the true value of love.
So, I have much to be grateful for, and I consider myself an incredibly lucky person.
I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving and a year filled with love and gratitude.
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5 comments:
Awww, Dim, this made me teary! But your cancer has made me see things more clearly too. Each day I also give thanks for family and friends - both in the morning and at night. And I have come to realize how each day is SO incredible and such a gift! Thank you so much for sharing such wonderful and personal thoughts. I love you!
We are grateful this Thanksgiving for the inspiration of your courage, the eloquence of your message, and the perspective they have brought to us on what is of true value in life and what is not. That's quite a gift, my friend. Thank you.
Dad,
Thank you for writing about your thoughts, they are so touching to read. Your courage throughout this whole time has been so remarkable, as has your will to be strong physically and mentally. I think we have all learned through you to relax more and appreciate all the wonderful aspects of life and living. Nothing makes me happier that the fact that you will know my two children. For that I am truly thankful.
I love you Dad and am so looking forward to Christmas! E.
Jim and Julie!!!
Happy Thanksgiving!!
It was SO nice to see you both! I'm glad to hear that Jim is getting better!
Sometimes the Universe send us weird experiences in life to learn different lessons in lif. I remember the first person to talk to me about the "power of Now" was Jim when I was just begining to work at the Lotus Center!!!! and now hear we are all in the same boat with different experience learning the same lesson!
Thanks for being my teacher!! you are absolutely wonderful and you were my most admired boss and the one who gave me the opportunity to succed in life as a therapist!
Love you
I hope to see you soon again
Ana Maria
PS? as usually : sorry for my English grammar... you know the reason.
Dear Jim and Julie,
I appreciate your comments about living in the moment very deeply. There is always more and suffering can take us there in a way that connects us with our deeper visions seen in dreams and poems.
Thinking of you, Mary
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